I’m Glad You’re Dead – The jury is still out on this one.

I’m Glad You’re Dead.
The Preternatural Chronicles, #1.
By Hunter Blain.
My rating ⭐ ⭐ ⭐ out of five stars.

My name is John Cook, and my life began the day my heart stopped beating.

You meet the most interesting men in Medieval prisons. This one time, I met a guy who offered me immortality for the low, low price of changing my diet. I didn’t read the fine print. Because he wasn’t talking about a gluten free diet. More like hemoglobin full.

And now I’m a friggin’ vampire with five centuries of pop culture references.

Granted, at the time, I was listening to the dying screams of my mother and father being burned and eviscerated alive just outside the rusty bars of the prison cell, and my new best friend was offering me my only real chance at saving my own life and avenging my parents’ murderers—some day.

Except my first chance at vengeance took about five hundred years, and I had to wade through oceans of sin and violence, blackening my soul—and my already dark sense of humor—beyond redemption until I met Father Thomes—a Roman Catholic Priest—in present-day Houston. Papa Thomes taught me how to use my dark curse to fight for the good guys. Like Alfred and Robin did for Batman—except we straight up murder Jokers and Two-Faces. Biteman and Pope’n.

We stand up for the downtrodden, the forgotten, and the neglected…

By exsanguinating the wicked in horrific, truly imaginative ways, and having a grand ol’ time doing it. You know what they say about doing what you love…

But our party is soon cut short when we learn the End of Days is just around the corner, and that the fine print of my contract might have hidden a few other tidbits. Like the fact that I was central to kicking off the Apocalypse, and that the Archdemons will stop at nothing to make sure The Dude Abides by the terms of his contract.

I guess I need a lawyer.

Once in a while I feel like trying out some new author and/or book series. I kind of get bored reading about events in the same universe over and over again even in the, unfortunately somewhat rare, cases the author is good enough to pull off a long running series.

Usually this is a bit of Russian Roulette even if you do try to read up on the reviews beforehand. Tastes differ of course and sometimes the ratings are just, well let’s say that they do not really reflect reality.

This one, well it is not a instant fail but for me the jury is really still out on this one.

The main protagonist is not really bad. He is the if violence doesn’t work try more violence type of guy and he lets his mouth run away… a lot. Oftentimes he provides background commentaries about what happens and how he feels which are quite entertaining. Not the best I’ve read but okay still.

Unfortunately, although he does provide a lot of ass kicking, he also does get beat up a lot which I really do not like. Also, the story feels somewhat jumpy. Sometimes I wondered how we got from there to here.

This is of course not helped by the fact that the book is shit-full of the dreaded flashback phenomenon. I really do not understand why this is so popular, both in books and TV-shows. I really dislike it.

Of course John has a few friends, kind of friends at least, in his entourage, but personally I never really felt much charisma flowing from these characters. Well, with the possible exception of Lily which seems somewhat cool. But then this is the first book so there is room for development.

The book takes its own take on vampires although it mostly follows the basic lore. What I’m not too convinced about is this idea that John is the last vampire walking the Earth. That actually plays a central role in the store as it advances but I still do not really like it.

Overall the story feels not entirely convincing. Like it is not really thought through and that the author is really making things up as he goes along. That can work if the author is experienced and really skilled at writing and story making but I feel that this is not the case here.

Having John harping about how he drives a bloody Kia (yuck) because it needs less gas and that it goes fast because it has a turbo (no Kia goes fast, sigh) does not really help the case of course.

So, bottom line, this read was not really a waste of time but it does end up on my maybe shelf which means that I will have a go at the second book in the series before I make up my mind.

4 thoughts on “I’m Glad You’re Dead – The jury is still out on this one.

  1. I checked out at “with 500 years of pop culture references”. I hate when urban fantasy books go that route.

    Well, 9 gets you 10 you read the rest of the series even if you don’t find it fantastic 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

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